Diary of a Clown/Called to the Principle's Office

Called to the Principles Office

A few years ago, I had just finished clowning at a Kindergarten Graduation. After finishing my show, I was told to wait in the waiting room of the Principle’s Office to get paid. The only one who was in there besides me, was this seven year old boy who was sitting there crying his eyes out while waiting to see the Principle. “Hey”, I said…”what are ya in for?” With a sobbing quivering voice, he replied…”A girl in my class…said I touched her in her privates”. “Well…did you?” With even more sobbing…”Yes…but um…um..it was an accident!” “My hand went like this and she was standing next to me (more sobbing) I…didn’t mean to!” “Well, (I said while keeping in clown character with my helium sounding voice and over expressing myself) tell the truth!” “But…um...Um (sob, sob) I’ll get into trouble…They won’t believe me!” “You might, but not as much trouble if you lie! DUH!” “How do you know?” His crying is starting to mellow down at this point. “Trust me, I know!”

After almost 10 minutes of trying o convince this Touching Bandit of telling his story exactly how it happened, the little sobbing voice looked up at me and asked…”Are you a Clown?” I honked my horn and said “What do you think?” As he started to answer me, the Principle’s secretary came out and paid me. As I was walking out with her, we were stopped by this pissed off looking woman who turned out to be the mother of the crying boy. Judging by her facial expression, this wasn’t her first time picking her son up at the Principle’s Office. She gave the Secretary one of those “What’s the verdict?” look. The Secretary said something to the tune of…”He’s ok, she just had a nice talk with him”. The mom said “Who?” “The Principle?” The Secretary answered back with…”No, her” and pointed to me. What was going on here? Was this a set up? After the mom walked away, the mom told me that this particular kid is a regular in the Principle’s office. Oh well! Honk Honk