Diary of a Clown/Surprise!

Surprise!

While coming from a Singing Gorilla-Gram, I was in the neighborhood of my friend Meredith, so I decided to surprise her by slipping back into my Gorilla costume and ringing her door bell. Although, she got a big kick out of me and laughed her head off, she knew exactly who was under all that Black Fur. As I started to take off my costume, she excitedly shouted…”No! No! Keep it on!””Benjamin is coming!” Benjamin was her Orthodox Jewish Rabbi Boyfriend she was dating at the time. About a minute later, the Door Bell rang. Meredith hid behind the door. After I looked through the Peep Hole and saw a Yamicka and Shroud, I opened up the door and started aping it up big time! He chuckled for a few seconds, and then got this crazed looked on his face and seductively grabbed me and then gave me this long drawn out kiss until Meredith appeared from behind the door. I was ready to grab him, since he looked like he was ready to pass out from shock! “What the….who the Hell was I kissing?” Meredith answered back with “Benjamin…meet my friend Susan!” Taking off my Gorilla Head and shaking his hand, I said…”Nice to meet you Rabbi?!” “Just out of curiosity, is it kosher to French kiss someone before you’re introduced to them?!” “Yea!” He embarrassingly stated back. “If you think they’re your Girlfriend!” “Amen!”

Talk about Surprise…After I left “Western Onion”, I worked at a Telemarketing job that had flexible hours which I would alternate with my Freelance singing Telegram jobs. I had a reputation for being a character amongst my fellow Telemarketers. After one of our Holiday parties, I had my Pink Gorilla costume with me, since I had a Telegram earlier. My friends talked me into going over to my boss at the after Party at the bar next door. I quickly slipped into my costume, walked into the Bar and snuck up behind my boss placing my furry black hands on her shoulder. Instead of the usual gasping, screaming or jumping back reaction I expected, she casually looked at me and said…”Oh, hi Susan” and continued to take another sip of her drink.

A few months later, I went to work for the NY Law Journal as a Telemarketer. I worked there for about eight years when it became a regular tradition on Halloween for me to walk in the Phone Room with my Gorilla or Chicken Costume on. Of course, it came as no surprise to me after a while, when people seemed to know it was me under all of that fur. One Halloween day, I walked into the Phone room on a day that I wasn’t scheduled to work which also happened to be Pay Day. Wearing my Gorilla Outfit, I motioned for George (my Boss) to pay
up. He handed me my check amidst all of the laughter and I walked out.

The next day, I walked back over to George, and with a straight face said….”Hey George, can I have my Pay Check?” At first he looked startled, paused for a moment, studied my face, which stirred up a giggle in me. “Nice try, Susan!”

One of my neighbors, who’s used to seeing me in my Clown Outfit, stopped me on the Street the other day and said…”Hey Susan, was that you the other day I saw walking on East 30th Street (I live on East 29th Street) dressed as a Gorilla?” Believe it or not…this time it wasn’t me!