Diary of a Clown/I Wan Go Washington
By Susan aka Polkadots the Clown

My first singing telegram was for a travel agent at a NY Amtrek office a couple of days before Thanksgiving in the middle of Grand Central Station of all places! I was to be dressed as a gorilla in a tuxedo.

Amidst the crowd of anxious travelers trying to book last minute trips to see there families for the Holiday, I managed to find my contact person who would set me up with my recipient. Her name was Tiesha. Tiesha was so excited that I was going to embarrass the heck out of one of her co-workers, that she rushed me into getting into my costume and then had me sit behind her co-worker`s (aka the recipient) desk.
At first, everyone was so tickled at the sight of a gorilla in a tuxedo sitting at there co-workers desk, that all the attention was on me getting the travelers even madder about not be tended to.
After about fifteen minutes, the excitement finally started to wear off and I was just another being sitting at the desk of a travel agent. Running out of air in that rubber furry monstrosity, I was getting ready to ask Tiesha when her co-worker was going to arrive, when this little old Spanish man with glasses that looked like magnifying glasses, comes over to me and says in broken English…. “I wan go Washington”. Now, he`s talking to a gorilla in a tuxedo, mind you! I tried telling him through all of my furriness and rubber, that I wasn`t an agent, but with all the loud irate voices, blending in with my muffled voice, I didn`t make my point. He just kept going on until one of the agents hysterically crying of laughter came over and led him to a seat.

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Another five minutes passed and wouldn`t you know it...The same man came over to me and this time demanded that I help him book a trip to Washington! He was finally interrupted by Tiesha saying that the recipient would be there any minute. At that point, I suddenly got a twinge of stage fright, since not only had I never delivered a singing telegram (let alone sing in front of such a large crowd) but how was this woman going to hear my muffled voice with all that kayos going on?
I then looked over at one of the male agents who bore a striking resemblance to one of my parents friends back home and who seemed to be getting a real kick out of me. So from there, I just pictured myself goofing off and entertaining my parents and there longtime friends and just started having fun causing this voice to come out of nowhere getting everyone’s laughter and attention. To this day, I still wonder if that little old man ever made it to Washington!

The End